Today was the day. I underwent my first haircut since my last one, which was on March 07, 2020. In that time, I grew out a great mane and a couple of beards, too. The growth was part juvenile endurance test ("wonder how long I can grow this out, huh huh), part hippyish roots relations exercise ("hair is the antennae to the spirit realm, man"). As the years rolled on, I came to understand that my long hair was a mourning exercise for all the various losses experienced in these early COVID years. Not to be that guy, but it's been challenging to move on. Getting the big chop over and done with felt about as meaningful as I'd hoped.
My answered prayer for a satisfying time capsule to showcase my hair looking as cool as possible came in the form of my friends Ryan and Steph casting me as a crazed metalhead in the video for Chat Pile's Tropical Beaches, Inc. Once the video was released, I thought "okay, I can get a cut whenever now."
Six months later, I decided I had to take my long hair to Camp before my cut. My hair came in handy in buffoonish clown anti-juggling acts and a portrayal of the titular Dragon With The Silver Tail, a musical written by my friend Jordan. I also invented a new character, Olympic Clown Coach Rilus Sololoner. I don't think I can do that character with short hair now. Doesn't make as much sense to me.
I love my big red hair. I feel lucky that my hair grows so thick and colorful. It's a calling card, it's something to take pride in as pretty much everything else going on with me physically is something for me to be mildly annoyed about. But, yeah. Long hair is annoying! You know the deal. It takes forever to dry. When it finally was dry, wearing it down felt like draping a blanket over my head. I tie my hair up, and suddenly I'm "man bun guy." Ya just can't win.
Anyway. This is the second time I've typed this post out, because the first go-around got deleted. I would add some photos, but the last time I did, this whole website crashed. It's time to cut, ha, this one short. Feel free to sound off in the comments with a favorite memory about my luscious hair. Feel free to celebrate my hair at any length.