Feels Good to Laugh
In the last three months of 2020, I noticed I wasn't laughing as much as I would like.
I started a "laugh tracker." A page in my journal where I could write down all the instances of laughter in my day.
I noticed after about two weeks that I was laughing once per day, at most.
Most of my laughter occurs in conversation with Ellena.
If I forget to write it down, I forget what made me laugh entirely.
"If you can measure it, you can manage it" is a good thing to remember for breaking bad habits. It's also good to remember for good habit forming. If I'm going to continue playing with, working on and developing a craft centering on making other people laugh, it really matters that I take time to, ya know, remember what it actually feels like to do the thing I'd like to allow others to feel.
Is it sad to be writing down each individual time I laugh, cataloging them like rare endangered bugs? A little. There's some imaginary ideal situation where I'm laughing so much, there's no need to take note.
But it's sad times. And I tell you: It feels good to sit down at the end of the month and review. To sit and remember all the little moments that made you laugh, and then to laugh at them all over again.