I know myself fairly well. I've been through this enough times to anticipate the internal roller coaster.
I'm proud of myself for even posting publicly that I want to do something new and daunting.
Another day comes, and there's a feeling that I need to consistently outdo yesterday's feat, even by one degree. That didn't happen today. But I have to be easy on myself about it. There's a longer game I'm playing. Here's a radical thought: Enjoy it. This is when I can imagine everything I want it to be. I can allow that pressure to lift me up, rather than crush me from above. Soon, I can position it behind me to propel me.
I've been pressuring myself to start ASAP. And I do want to start soon. But today I read the question: How do you organize your thoughts and provide structure for your ideas?
It's not exciting. But maybe I've been too excited in the weeks I've been home. Structure will give my scattered thoughts a chance to grow in manageable direction.